I'm going to give you something awesome. Hold out your pinky toe and open your nose.

WOOOOOOOOOAH! Has it really been that long? Oh well, my one and only follower sees me on a near-daily basis, so I guess slacking off on this blog isn't the biggest blunder of my month now is it? So what have I been up to? Let's see, well last weekend I finally got to edit a picture on sunday and even wrote a short song-ish poem thing to go with it.



Then later I got together with Momo again and we watched some funny movies; My cousin Vinney, The Whole Nine Yards, and I can't remember the other. It was a blast as usual, and I got to introduce her to my dad and one of our local fav's, Lombardo's Deli. We had a really good meatball sammich. Then for dinner we went to Red Robin and got matching burgers. And after that we went to the parking lot outside of the Coffea Bean by her house and played guitar sitting on my trunk. It was nice. She even got to hear me humm and pretend to sing for like 5 seconds.

Then on monday my buddy Gabe asked me to go shoot after work with him because it was so foggy and eerie. We went right back to the same place Momo and I visited the night before. So I figured Momo was only 40 yards away why not call her and see if she could come hang too. This time we went behind the Coffee Bean where I discovered an entire harbor and a field with this creepy looking tree in the middle of the fog. The way the lights hit the foggy air just made it that much more creepy and I simply had to get a picture.



We took a bunch of other pictures in the night, and eventually we ended up on the bridge going over the harbor as we were surrounded by 5 security patrols. one in a car, 3 on foot and one on bicycle. And we had some random cat making "Mow" noises, but it honestly sounded like a middle aged man mixed with a cat being stepped on. It was hilarious. We took some awesome shots from the bridge, one of which I actually thought looked better crooked. Get what I mean?



 I got to the middle of the bridge and laid down in the middle propped up on my bag. Gabe took pics of me looking like a bum and then the rent-a-cops started closing in, so we headed out.

Then things calmed down a bit as the regular work week ensued. But last night Momo told me that her mom actually insisted that she come hang with me. WOW! So we came back to my place so I could do some wash. OH YEAH!

Ok new side story 'Cause I don't feel like going back and finding out where this fits in the week, so deal with it. On sunday while Momo was over I tried to do some laundry and found that the washer was broken. I haven't washed my work pants in a whole week and I really needed to wash some socks because I had none clean. But since I didn't have time to go to the laundromat with my schedule, I just went ahead and bought some socks at K-Mart. 10 pair for 5 bucks, not bad! Finally I ask my landlord what's up. He says he is looking for a new one but can't find any good deals on craigslist in Camarillo. I turn around, walk to my computer and type in "washer" on craigslist, and the very top, first listing available, posted less than an hour ago, is a washer, in Camarillo, for 50 dollars...Epic win.

So anyways, he got it and we watched Shawshank Redemption while I washed my work clothes and such. Yay.

Today was alright. The first 4 hours of my day went by pretty fast. We had a company luncheon with a professional taquiador or however you spell it. Basically he makes tacos for a living. And they had hundreds of little cheesecake bites, so naturally I had to take 14. Mmmmmmmmm.  And the next 6 hours of my shift was meh. It was raining all day, and still is right now. Thanks to my website upkeep and enrolling in school I just so happen to be in debt and can't afford a rain coat or an umbrella, and my boss informed me that he couldn't get one today so I had to try to do the paperwork in the rain without getting it wet...Yeah, right. Long story short I had a pocket full of wadded up wet papers to scan. I also had to think like mcguyver and wrap an empty coffee filter bag around my scanning gun and tape it up so it didn't get wet. Then I snuck over to St. Francis (my old job) and steal their staple gun so I could ensure that the wet barcode tags would stop getting blown off by the wind and rain. Man, if I wasn't the only person who witnessed my creativite and quick thinking I swear I would have been tested for halucinagins and then promoted to some awesome position where my brain could better be put to use. But alas, no dice. But my Uncle did bring me this nifty rain suit, and he just so happened to get my favorite color, green! I looked like the forest-green...lime flavored kool-aid guy. But the self-proclaimed "Mexican spokesman" in the office got the other guys to start calling me avocado man. Then I remembered I had a $10 WalMart gift card, so I took my half hour break and got a matching green umbrella. They all had a good laugh when I got back. =P

So that's my week in a not so nutshell. Oh and I found a buried treasure in my unfinished photos folder that I totally forgot to post back when I actually shot this a year or so ago. So here you go. Booya!



And now I will return to my not-so-ordinary life, listening to Pandora radio and chatting on yahoo while racking up my killstreak on black ops. An hour ago I went 23/1 in a TDM, yes, I'm a beast. But what can I say, representing the world's finest requires a good deal of ownage. Don't believe me? Here's my 3rd highest K/D ratio from Modern Warfare 2.



Yeah, yeah. Video games. Nerds. Whatever you want to say, I'm fine with that. That clan tag is there for a reason, and if you want to put the conrtoller down and feel what it really is like when I'm hunting you, we can have that arranged. No I'm not gointg to kill anyone, I'm referring to paintball. DUH! You wan't to kill people, go enlist. Otherwise you're all mine mwahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaapickle.

Ok, back to socializing with Moomoo. Weeeeeeeee!

IT FINALLY CAME!!!

My day off that is!

So yesterday after a wonderfully short 4 hour work day I called one of my co-workers / photo buddies, Gabe, and asked if he wanted to go shoot while I still had some daylight. He suggested we hit up the Ventura pier. We took turns with the tripod, because he's a bum and doesn't believe in getting his own. I took shots mostly while the light was still up, while he took some pretty amazing night shots from on top of the pier.

Long exposures + water = <3    :)




Then today totally took the cake.

Woke up like any other first sunday of the month, got ready and left to go work the projection at the church. But between first and second services I had the pleasure / honor to pick up Momo and bring her with. I felt bad because I had to make her sit alone as I still had to run the tech, but she seemed to have a good time during service despite having a hard time sitting all alone (IM SORRY!). Then things just started getting awkward in a good and bad way. For the first time since I started going to Calvary Chapel Camarillo, I was invited to go to lunch with other people. We went to a restauraunt that I used to work at back in high school, Burger Barn! MMMMMMM chilly burger! And oddly enough, dispite Morgan's claim to being shy and bad around strangers, she somehow fit right in! She didn't necessarily walk up and introduce herself to anyone, but plenty of people walked up and introduced themselves to her! The ONLY thing that made the whole lunch thing awkward is when I found a seat at our big table with the group, my first Ex-girlfriend, Jill, just so happened to take the seat RIGHT NEXT TO MINE while I was in line... so I had to ask Momo to switch seats with me so she could be between us. (Trust me, it was necessary. Jill is the very reason I never get invited to church events anymore, and the reason I have gone for 6 years without a single friend. To this day she still makes my life awkward and uncomfortable at the very sight of her and her hateful eyes. As if the rumors she spread weren't ridiculous enough, she has to sit there, SEVEN YEARS since the last time she's ever even seen me, and give me dirty looks in front of everyone including our pastor.) But the drama-queen aside, Momo made incredible progress as it seemed everyone on our side of the table, except Jill, was throwing bombardments of questions at Morgan in a genuine interest. Every couple minutes I threw a joke into the mix when Mo said something funny, just to remind them I was still at the table, but either way it became apparent to me why I was finally asked to spend time with people... Because I had a genuinely interesting person at my side. Thanks Mo!

Then after lunch Momo and I headed to the Ventura cross, with a few random detours to the wrong streets and back to the freeway 3 times. We got to the top of the hill, amazed at how beautiful the sky was and how perfect it was for pictures, only to find 30+ cars lining the entire hillside as there was a wedding going on. UGH! But no worries, we went down a little ways towards the bottom, found some parking, then walked back up to the small park/benches area just below all the crowds at the top and continued our picture picnic :)

And now I have the pleasure of sharing the first two shots from today's epic adventures
I finally got to use my new lens! I had it for over a week now and never even had a chance to take it out of the box and shoot. <3 day's off!



And then after the photos we snuck back to my house and tried out my newly added netflix I got on my PS3. We watched 'About A Boy' and 'The Count of Monte Cristo' while talking about how much fun we had today.

All in all, this weekend was a total success. Even though I gotta get up in 5 hours to start another work week at the job I never thought I would hate as much as I do now, I'm not gonna let it get me down because I can truly say that this weekend brought me enough happiness to last the rest of the week at least, haha. Doesn't mean I'm going to enjoy my work or not have anything to complain about, but it definately means that instead of complaining about it, I'll simply think about the happier things that keep my mind off of the unhappy things. Thanks again for the awesome time, Gabe (no homo) and Morgan
Hope everyone else (whoever you are... you internet stalkers, you) is having a great holiday season!

~SW23.

Where has my heart gone? An uneven trade for the real world...?

Well, It's not much of a surprise to me, but I may as well just admitt it for those of you, whoever you are, who don't know. I'm a bit of a flake. Not like I had a specific daily word count quota or anything, but I do tend to not manage my updating priorites very well. But better late than never right? So what's been goin on lately? Oh boy, too much.

So I'll just throw it all out there randomly for the sake of not pretending to be any more organized than I really have been. Last week was decent. Went to work, did my thing, went home and eventually got over being sick. Saturday I went to Momo's house and spent the day with her family playing Farkle and Apples to Apples, then we watched a movie called House of D. The movie was good, very touching story and all, but hit a little too close to home at some points and I had to turn my head from Momo before she noticed my eyes watering. (Yes I get sucked into good stories, but stuff that is still fresh in my memory can only be pushed so far down before the right movie or song baits it back to the surface again) But then we went to see the new installment of the Harry Potter series. It was pretty good, though I'm not sure how 2 hours passed without me even realizing. Then we went to her house for an ALMOST midnight snack with pumkin pie and plenty of cool wHip then made my way to my car, only to run back and knock on her door to make her come out and see the HUGE moon.

Sunday was very nice indeed. Momo came over and we watched some more movies and spent more time getting to know eachother talking and quoting more random movies. That is, of course, until I fell asleep. I didn't sleep much the night before, so I kind of ruined the "go out and play" plans as she decided to forego waking me up to instead sit and stare at the adorable wonder which was my sleeping face. Yeah...women. Since I was so out of it, I can't 100% recall the events of the evening after Momo went home, all I know is I went to bed early because Monday was a day I would not soon look back on with fondness.

Monday was hell. Not going to sugar coat it. The last three days have been hell actually. I got moved to a new facility and no longer have my old job. My manager is also taking over management for another company and told me I would get a small pay raise, health benefits and PLENTY of hours. The only thing he didn't mention was that the work is near-impossible for someone with a short mental capasity like me. Oh that and the "plenty" of hours actually means a schedule that will suck the life out of me. Not to complain about having too many hours during a recession, but lets be honest here, I'll be working from 9a.m. to 7 or 9p.m. from Monday through Saturday, year round. Sounds great for a hard working man right? Well guess what, I work at the church on Sundays and that means I dont get a single day off... all year. Yeah, yeah, boo-hoo no more social life no more hopes of spending time with friends let alone finding someone who might marry me. And that's just it. If I was married with a house and family to provide for, this job would be perfect because I know when I get home from work I have my beloved wife and kids to keep me company and share in their happiness and such. But I'm not married, I don't have anyone but myself to provide for, and I am trying to put myself through school so I might be able to rise above 10 bucks an hour. That's a pretty nice wage, but here in southern California, 10 bucks and hour for 60 hours a week won't even get you an apartment, and I know I'm not going to rent rooms in a stranger's house for the rest of my life. I need to get to school, but my boss said very specifically: No days off. if you're too sick, he want's a doctor's note releasing me from work. There is no other reciever to cover me if I take classes.

So basically, I just got stuck in a position that I can't keep up with. With the recent amount of stress I've been under, I reached a near breaking point today and asked one of the other managers what my options are if I could go back to my old position and find someone more suited for this one. I am perfectly fine with 30-40 hour work weeks with weekends off and a little more flexibility, even if there are no health benefits or awesome paychecks. I'd sooner get fired from my new position for all the mistakes I'm making anyways. And the best part is...It's not hard work at all. It's not like I don't understand it all, It's just too much at once and my brain literally can't process all of the things I have to do without getting nervous and making stupid mistakes. And if you know anything about shipping business, once you make a mistake in recieving, that mistake continues to go through the system all the way until we ship the wrong product, get billed for it and rejected, then my boss has to call the corperate and explain to HIS boss that he hired a reciever who is making tiny mistakes here and there that are costing the business thousands...And guess what; My boss called me into his office today to tell me just that! He said I'm only 3 days into the new position and I'm already getting worse with every day. He sees that I'm visibly nervous, and wants to know if I will show improvement. I wanted to say no please let me back to my old job, but another manager at the company was the one who referred me to that position (I didn't know that until today) and if I bail on this job, then that manager who stuck his neck out for me gets in trouble too. So I'm at a loss here. not sure what to do. If I keep this job, I will have to sacrifice social life, me-time, friends and family, school, and probably the biggest slam in the face, photography. That's right. If I'm stuck at work from the time I wake up 'til long after the sun is gone, every day of the year, I'll have to give up any hopes of booking clients or going out just to shoot pictures like this one:



I for one do not believe in the 'american dream'. I'd much rather work my butt off to piece together my rent, then spend all my free time chasing my two passions: photography and people. Without my artistic expression and the people close to me whom I share it with, my life would amount to nothing more than a weekly paycheck and reciepts for all the food I wasted it on, as I would do nothing more than work and eat and sleep simply to sustain my lifeforce while my soul deteriorates...That is NOT what I plan to let happen.


But wait! There may be hope! Although I'm not 100% sure on the details, I went ahead and enrolled for spring 2011 classes in the evenings anyways! If I lose my job, then I'm fine because I'm ready for change and if this is the way to bring it about then bring it on! But hopefully I can sit and talk with the boss and explain that I'm young and trying to put myself through school, so I signed up for classes that start at 6p.m. two days a week, so for those two days i can come in 9-5 and go to classes, then take saturdays for projects / field trips as required by the class. That way maybe, JUST MAYBE I'll be able to even out my schedule to include some free time and life-progression as I go to school. But this is all just hopeful thinking for now. I'm hoping I can take the classes I want, and hoping the boss doesn't let me go when he finds out I'm taking control of my schedule. and I'm also hoping that if I can balance school and work and continue my position, perhaps those health benefits and pay raise might help me put some money in the bank while I get my teeth fixed and finally start wearing glasses after more than 13 years without them. So since I know only one person who reads this blog; Momo, whoever else is out there, along with Momo, if you are people of prayer, I would appreciate all the help I can get. Both for my situation at hand, as well as my anxiety problems as I have come to realize my fuse is much shorter than I imagined and lately every little thing has caused intolerable amounts of pain even though I know everything's not all that bad. I think I need a break from life.

On the shores of Neverland



4:15 in the morning. Got caught up in pictures again instead of sleeping and keep coming back to this one. I put a different song and lyrics  on flickr, but was struggling with the right title. So for those of you reading this, THIS was the original title I had for this photo. The poem just kind of happened. Not uncommon at this time of day, especially after catching a cold and eating an entire family sized can of campells chicken noodle soup with Red Robin seasoning all over it, with pizza flavor-blasted gold fish crackers and a plain bagel to dip in the broth. Nonetheless, it's my first poem since age 15. Enjoy

On the shores of Neverland

   

Carried away in the arms of a dream

The journey neverending it seems

'Til finally I am washed ashore

To a place I've never been before

Though vaguely familiar, my memory askew

Imagination soaring as I breathe anew

My past, my present, all but forgotten

I embrace this new future, a path not foretrodden

Against the brilliant skies dance colors of fire and water

The sun sets, burning the clouds hotter and hotter

In the distance a small voice draws my attention

Color and sound fades, my thoughts caught in suspension

And just as I close my eyes for a second

My feet start forward as my heart now is beckoned

I open my eyes as she takes my hand

As we take our first steps towards neverland

That's what she said...

And of course, the title has nothing to do with anything. Take that cliche expectations!!!!

So what have I been doing all week? Simple. Wake up, do a bunch of stuff, go back to sleep. And just for the record, the weekend was a BLAST! Momo came over and watched some movies with me saturday, then sunday I made it to church an hour late and somehow managed to pull off all the projection duties without missing a beat, even after the band skipped a song and changed the order. With four hours sleep I felt so on top of things! And then sunday night I went to Rosalie's house with 10 other people to play a game called Curses. I won, not by choice though.

So if you haven't played any of those quirky social ice-breaker games like cranium or shout or whatever, then here is a really funny one that you have to have a video camera handy to catch the idiocy in real time. Trust me, you won't soon forget it.

The basic breakdown is that everyone is an actor in the game. There is a deck of "challenge" cards. Everyone takes turns picking up challenge cards and doing exactly what it says, then the other plays have to vote on whether or not the act was convincing. If the majority votes no, then the failed actor mus draw a card from the curses deck and do exactly what the card says. And if at any moment during the game that player is caught not following their curse, any other player can ring the bell and call them on it, and they get a strike. 3 strikes and you are out. And you must obey ALL curses, no matter how many you draw, which makes things interesting if you have one that says to cross all your fingers while another one says to  scratch your back every time you read a card (as if picking a card from the deck isn't hard enough with the crossed fingers)

So a quick example of the first 2 hours of our night? Well, at the table, To my right was Aubree, To her right was Krista, Steven on my left, Candice Rose and her daughter and Krista's brother Zack were across on the other side of the table. Here's how the shinanigans went down.: Krista drew a challenge card that said something like "You are a Vet. Demonstrate to the other players how to rescue a hamster suffering a heart attack." She started acting like a surgeon, asking someone to hand her a scalpel and and knife. For fear of future hamster-hack-n-slash horror film scenarios, we gave her a unanimous thumbs down. She drew a curse card that read: "Any time you speak you must pinch your nose." And so Krista had a hard time breathing and laughing without popping her ears the rest of the game, and she sounded ridiculous. Next aubree failed her challenge and got a curse that she had to pretend she was being attacked by deadly mosquitos every time she spoke and had to swat them away.... Try to imagine someone flailing their arms around their face every time they talked... it was like watching a live enactment of TIMMA!!!! from southpark. Maybe. I had some interesting challenges. I had to explain to Steven why I wouldn't marry him. Basically told him he had a weiner and I wasn't interested.  Then I had to ask him to the prom... and then break the news to him that he was pregnant... WHY DID THE ONLY TWO GUYS IN THE ROOM GET ALL THE WEIRD ONES?!?!?! Oh well, I failed one and had to be cursed with the rock star curse. Every time I spoke I had to strum an imaginary guitar... Looked more like I had some kind of twitching disease. Near the end of the game, to sum it up, Every time Krista read a card, Aubree had to bark like a rabid dog while swatting away mosquitos, And every time anyone made an animal noise, Rose had to be really itchy and scratch, at the same time any time someone named a food Rose had to clap her hands. Then any time anyone clapped their hands, Steven had to stand up and take a bow, While candice had to sneeze and make an animal noise every time she spoke while pretending her wrists were superglued to her forehead (watching her try to eat was histerical until someone had to help her out). Eventually every time anyone did anything, everyone else at the table had to react like an idiot or risk losing the game. It was hilarious.

Ok, so back to Monday... yucky work day! After stayin up all night playin games and watchin The Princess bride with the gang, and talkin to Momo after she woke up feeling unwell, I finally got home around 4 am, edited some pictures until about 6:30, then crashed. The sunrise, I might add, was INCREDIBLE! Anyways.  slow day at work, I got lifted up in a little basket with the forklift and had to clean pipes on the ceiling of the 3-story-tall overhang. Total yawn-fest until I got my ipod out of my car and just let the time pass as the world dissappeared and I cleaned the same pipes at least three times. Finally got home and got around to uploading my latest picture to flickr. Check it out!
Just remember to click the picture link and see the description, as there are lyrics and encouragement along with the imagery. =D



Then while editing the picture my old friend Jessica decides to randomly start talking to me again and takes a sudden interest in my personal issues and my so-called love life. I fill her in, catch up with her a bit, then make the mistake of mentioning that I found someone who could be worth the effort and BAM, she's all over me, just buggin' the crap out of me until I agree to give her some info so she can go do what girls do best and talk behind my back about me. Lucky me. But then again, life is finally getting interesting again after a mediocre routine-driven relationship with someone else not worth naming. So hey, why not let things hit the fan once in awhile? It could be a mess worth cleaning up after =P

So finally, I'm all caght up with the weekend and am about ready to settle down and have some me time. What am I going to do? not sure. Probably go to CVS and get a 10 dollar desk heater so my room might actually reach above 45 degrees tonight. This house is alright, but it is broken and has no insulation at all, the window doesn't even close properly, so the three blankets I use at night only do so much good against the 36 degree morning dew. I'm thinking 10 dollars is worth it as opposed to the money I'd throw away on cold remedies and possible doctor bills as a result.

But don't get me mixed up here, not tryin to complain by any means. I learned some scary facts about where my dad was in Kenya and the amount of suffering most people my age would never dream of and here these kids over there live it every day. Random scary tribal tradition: In order for a widowed woman to prove that she was loyal to her husband during his life, she has to sleep with her husband's corpse or face public humiliation and/or death for being unfaithful to her marriage. No joke...America has way too many things to take for granted, makes information like that just send shivers down my spine thinking about the differences in cultures and traditions. Here's a photo my dad took of a boy no older than I am. He admitted that most of the teens and men his age have to inhale chemicals and get high in order to numb the pain in their stomaches caused by starvation. Most of them know that they won't live to see thirty, if they're lucky enough to see twenty. Now I feel stupid for ever complaining about my tummy growling at work.

So tomorrow, hopefully, will bring some good news and answered prayers. If not, then I'll just have to make the most of it and keep up the good attitude. Hope everyone else out there is having a great week, whoever you are! Get well soon Momo!

~sw23


(Update: I ended up at dennys around 2:19 a.m. by myself after getting my 10 dollar heater from cvs. It was delicious, but I caught a cold)